We Are Having A Baby!
Yes the rumors are true… I’m pregnant!
If we’re friends on Instagram or Facebook you have been in the know for a while (lets be friends if we aren’t yet!)…. but today I am SO excited to finally share this special news with our Beautiful Living community.
Sean and I feel so blessed to be welcoming a sweet little baby boy into our lives come the end of May/early June. We truly couldn’t be more grateful and excited!
Last week we talked about transitions….
well…..being pregnant is definitely the greatest transition I’ve ever gone through — in my heart and in my outer world.
My whole life I’ve been fascinated by transitions: the stages of newness, disorientation, and re-integration they bring us; the deep inner work of re-evaluating our identity; and all the inner, outer, and cultural supports we can lean on through them.
Right now, I’m smack-dab in the middle of this transition. This is the sacred chrysalis time, the transformational moment, the period of Huge Unknown: our child isn’t here yet, but I’m already forever changed. I am asking questions such as: What does being a mother mean to me? How will my life change? How will my marriage change? Who will I be? And how can I bring the very best of myself to this precious time?
When you’re face-to-face with a big transition, support your heart and home in every way you can.
Today I would love to share the practices and perspectives I’m relying on as I navigate this transition. Whether you’re pregnant or facing a completely different transition (like a relationship change, a career shift, or even a personal growth spurt), — I hope these suggestions help you feel more supported, resourced, and clear.
1. Shift Your Space
Oh, there is so much I could say about preparing a space for a baby! (Stay tuned for a more detailed post about this soon.) For now, I’m learning, exploring — and keeping my eye on the big picture.
As I say so often: the spaces we inhabit reflect who we are back to ourselves. And when we update them — to align them with who we are now, and who we’re becoming — they can provide powerful support. This is especially helpful during periods of transition, when everything’s in flux, and we need to find our new footing in the world.
During my pregnancy, I have been shifting my space in a few ways. First, I’m editing it (way better than “decluttering”) to release old, outdated things and make room for baby. I’m also tying up “loose ends” in my physical world: completing our wedding album, finalizing my MFT licensure, and wrapping up other extraneous projects that have been sucking my energy. All of this feels like a good, important use of time right now, so I can be fully present and engaged when the little guy arrives.
2. Tend to Your Heart
Right now, in the middle of this transition, I’m being as open and gentle with myself as possible. I’m listening to what I need and giving myself permission to do/eat/be and feel those things. I’m surrendering to the entire process. I truly don’t know who I’m going to be on the other side of this journey. So right now I’m exploring the aspects of my spirit I know I want to bring forward … while opening myself and allowing this transition into motherhood to change me.
I’ve also been struck with (and surprised by) a strong sense of introversion during this pregnancy. I’ve become a little more private, quiet, and even a bit socially withdrawn. I have plenty of energy — yet I’m craving quiet and lots of alone time. I am trusting this, honoring it as much as I can and paying close attention to exactly what I need in any given moment.
Finally, I’m staying keenly aware of when I start comparing myself to other mothers or am trying to base my decisions and reality on the things that make other women happy. It’s such a practice, to return over and over again to my own heart, and listen to her wisdom.
However “common” the transition, everyone navigates it differently. Listen to the voice of your own heart: what will make YOU happy?
3. Cultivate Your Mind
Transitions are a mental activity, too: they ask us to shift our ideas about who we are, and what we’re doing in the world.
As I think about this pregnancy, I’m very aware: I’m a first-time mother. I’ve never done this before. I’m going be a novice at everything: childbirth, breastfeeding, swaddling, creating a new dynamic in my marriage as parents, and just keeping another precious human being alive and well.
So, of course: I have a certain level of fear and anxiety bubbling up. But rather than getting swept away by it or making it wrong, I’m trying to normalize and honor my fear. This is easier said than done….But I’ve learned over time: the most fulfilling things in my life have also been the scariest and most vulnerable. I am constantly reminding myself that these feelings aren’t a bad thing: they’re actually a sign that something wonderful, important, and precious is underway.
4. Honor Your Body
Pregnancy is more physical than many transitions — but I think caring for our bodies provides massive support, no matter what’s going on in our lives.
Right now, I’m doing my best to take exquisite care of my body. I’m listening to her cues, watching her change and getting to know who she is becoming. Consistent but gentle exercise has been essential, for me. Pilates and massage have been my go to’s. I’m also drinking plenty of water to keep my mind clear and my mood up.
There is no doubt… having a baby is a huge physical transformation. To say that my body is not my own is an understatement but it also one of the most beautiful profound experiences I have ever had.
5. Pay Attention To Your Relationships
Just as I am shifting and changing so are many of my relationships. Some are maturing and deepening to new levels, others have needed updating and re-evaluating and a few have completely fallen away.
Just as I have been grieving parts of my life that are going to dramatically change after the baby comes, I am also grieving how my relationships are going to shift as well. My time and energy already isn’t what it once was, and my priorities around what is most important to me are changing too. I feel my circle getting smaller. More potent, but also more spacious.
Having conversations with those I love most has been extremely important. Some have been concerned, annoyed and questioning of me. Others have been trusting, supportive and loving. I have found that sharing openly and honestly about where I am and what I need has worked the best. Spaciousness to change and the freedom to do so without judgement or expectation has been my greatest request.
Being in a state of limbo can be powerful when we stand fully in, and open to, everything that is unknown. – Click To Tweet
Even though I feel familiar with the process of transition, it’s still a huge deal and I’m certainly not immune to the disorientation and anxiety that comes with it. These tools truly are helping me navigate this moment, and dance with all the Big Unknowns with more presence and ease.
I feel so honored by the opportunity to welcome this precious new life into the world and I’m grateful for the beautiful ways I have already grown and will continue to grow as I make the full transition into motherhood.
Reflections for Your Heart and Home…
Share your insights and questions in the comments below or explore in your journal
In Your Heart: Think about a transition you are going currently through or have gone through in the past…. What practices have helped navigate the roller coaster of change?
In Your Home: How do you handle the unknown? What tangible items that provide you comfort and support when you are feeling anxious or fearful?
Sending Love, Rebecca A note about the photos… Taking maternity photos wasn’t something I had planned on doing but and I am SO glad I did. Not only do we have beautiful images to remember this precious time by, but it also felt so luxurious to spend an entire afternoon focused on getting my mama glow on and feeling beautiful and feminine. It was such a special experience for me, and one I would highly recommend if you are expecting! Special thanks to… Paige Green for her warm presence and gorgeous images. Melanie Kluger for helping learn how to style and feel great in my new body. And Sherrie Long for always making me feel and look my best.